Five Robins in a Room
by RobinIV
Summary: What if there were five Robins in a room? It would definitely make for interesting conversation. Contain YJ2 characters. Special guest appearance.
1. Five Robins in a Room

Five Robins in a Room

By Kelly M. Maraglia

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Robin, Young Justice, or DC Comics in any way. The only Robin I own is Keelia, who is now the fifth Robin in existence. Oh wait, she does not exist at all because DC killed off Stephanie. glares full of hatred shot at DC from Robin fans This story was born of my **rage** over the **SEVERE** lack of recognition and resolution of Stephanie's death.

_Prologue_

Keelia Robin Drake walked around her house with a rare smile on her face. She hummed Christmas carols and decorated gleefully, smelling the delicious aromas of dinner and homemade cookies. The Drake family was playing hosts to the annual Christmas party of the Justice League and Young Justice 2. Keelia smiled as she witnessed her father, Timothy Drake, making the house Lobo and Bart-proof. Her young brother, Jason, was by the tree, shaking his presents, trying to figure out what toys he was getting. Keelia's mother, Stephanie, was in the kitchen, preparing dinner for her guests.

Keelia heard a wooden spoon drop to the floor and went to peek in on her mother, but Stephanie was no longer there. Meanwhile, the doorbell rang, signaling the arrival of their guests. As Keelia turned toward the door, she felt a horrible pain in her chest and collapsed to the floor. She heard her brother cry and witnessed Jason fade away. She looked down at her own hands and saw that she, too, was fading.

As her consciousness drifted, she heard Marcus calling out to her and then her eyes closed.

We saw a simple room with five, comfy chairs arranged in a circle. On one wall, there was a one-way mirror. There were no doors or windows. The wall opened (there is the door) and a young woman walked in. She carefully decorated the room with a poster of Young Justice, a poster of Teen Titans, some Robin action figures, 2 porcelain figures of Robin and a Robin bobble head. She laid a soft mattress on the floor in the middle of the circled chairs and left the room swiftly.

Suddenly, a large swirling portal appeared on the ceiling. Five figures fell from the portal, one at a time. They each bounced off the mattress and landed in an upright position in one of each of the chairs. There was something similar about these five figures. Did they all have dark hair? No, one was blonde. Were they all male? No, two were female. The reason that these five people were similar was the attire they wore. Although two of the five wore short pants and pixie boots, all five people were dressed as the superhero (ine), Robin. All looked at each other in disbelief.

_"Welcome my precious guests, welcome to Arcanum's pocket dimension!" _A female voice spoke from behind the one-way mirror.

"Who are you and why are we here?" Robin #1 asked.

_"Well I shall have to do something about that Robin insert number here thing. It is bound to become confusing."_ The one the Robins assumed was Arcanum said. They looked at the one-way mirror in confusion.

_"As for the unspoken question as to how you got here, it was magic. So let us thank our benefactor, Mr. Harry Potter!" _(**AN: **I do not own Harry Potter or any related elements to him. If you thought I did, you are silly.)

"I'm surprised you let me in your story since you hated my last two books." Harry commented dryly.

_"Please do not misunderstand Mr. Potter. I did not like Book 5 because Sirius got the absolute shittiest death scene in existence! I did not like Book 6 because it was excessively predictable and just all around sucked! However, you go all vigilante in Book 7 so that one should be good." _Arcanum explained her opinions. (**AN**: These are MY opinions! Please do not flame me saying, "How could you say such things about Harry Potter 6?")

"Book 7 was good." Robin #5 spoke up.

_"It was? Oh good, that gives me something to look forward to."_ Arcanum replied excitedly.

"I did not even know Book 6 came out." Robin #4 commented.

_"There is a reason for that, but we'll get to it. Thanks Harry! Now, shall we begin?"_

"Begin what exactly?" Robin #3 asked.

_"Fair question, Mr. Drake. Yes, we cannot have anymore of this Robin # etc crap! First thing on the menu is revealing of the identities!"_

"You can't do that!" Robin #2 shouted.

_"Oh yes I can, Mr. Todd. Now do shut up so I may continue. This is my pocket dimension. It will be the scene for many future potentially silly stories, I believe. I have been reading comic books for many, many years my friends and in that time, there have been four Robins. The fifth of you is from a potential future. I thought it would be interesting to have all five of you in one room to discuss relevant issues and perhaps I shall bring you all back later on for some silly stuff. Now with the introductions…"_


	2. Introductions

Five Robins in a Room

By Kelly M. Maraglia

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Robin_, _Young Justice_, or _DC Comics_ in any way. The only Robin I own is Keelia, who is now the fifth Robin in existence. "_War Crimes_" has given me some resolution to Stephanie's death, not that it helps much. She is still dead. sigh I do not own any _Monty Python_ references; I just own all of _Flying Circus_ on tape and _Holy Grail_ on DVD. I do not own _Inuyasha_ either.

_Chapter 2 - Introductions_

We return to the little room now revealed to be Arcanum's Pocket Dimension. On our last episode, the five Robins in the supposed historical continuity of DC Comics were dropped into this room to meet each other and discuss relevant issues. We also met Arcanum, the rather silly gatekeeper to her pocket dimension who has clearly watched too much _Monty Python_ lately.

_And now for something completely different…_

I lied; here is chapter 2 of the same story.

"You can't force us to reveal our identities!" Robin #2 shouted.

_"You must always be a pain in the rear, Mr. Todd, why is that? I am very confuzzled."_ Arcanum replied.

"Don't you mean, 'confused?'?" Robin #4 tried to clarify.

_"But saying confuzzled is more fun!"_ Arcanum cheerfully responded.

The five Teen Wonders sighed in unison.

_"That was so cool! Do it again!"_ Arcanum cheered.

"Look, what is your point in bringing us here?" Robin #3 stood and said in a "no-nonsense" type tone.

_"Mr. Drake, sit!"_ Arcanum ordered.

Robin #3 fell flat on his face onto the mattress, which sprang him back into an upright position into his chair again. (**AN:**That goes out to the _Inuyasha_ fans!)

_"Now listen, I'm tired of the Robin insert number here thing! Plus, if you want to know why you're here, go back and read chapter one."_ Arcanum said with mild annoyance in her voice.

"You want us to reveal our identities to each other and discuss relevant issues, right?" Robin #1 asked.

_"At least somebody read chapter one!"_ Arcanum replied with a humph. (**AN: **Thanks SO MUCH to my two reviewers! You two rock! Here is a cookie for each of you!)

"Well, what if some of our identities might reveal parts of the future that people shouldn't know?" Robin #5 asked.

_"Leave it to you to ask the relevant question, Miss KRD. The very same reason I did not reveal your last name. Much information from the future will be revealed here, but when you all eventually leave, you may be limited in what you remember. The passage of time must continue to flow and although it pains me to let you go on to possible deaths, I must eventually let you go."_ Arcanum answered, her tone for once, having no silliness in it.

_"But who cares about that now!"_ Arcanum added quickly. There was the silliness again.

_"Now for your introductions, please remove your mask, and I will ask you three questions. If you answer them all, it will be the next person's turn."_ Their zany host explained.

"What if we do not answer them all?" Robin #4 asked warily.

_"Uh….we'll cross that bridge of death when we come to it!"_ Arcanum smiled.

Robin #1 took off his mask.

_"What is your name?"_ Arcanum asked.

"Richard Grayson," Dick replied.

_"What is your quest?"_ Arcanum asked with laughter in her voice.

"Uh, to fight crime in Gotham City?" Dick replied, thrown off by the question.

_"What is the airspeed velocity of an unladed swallow?"_ Arcanum asked and promptly cracked up.

Robin #3 whispered something to Dick.

"Uh, okay. What do you mean? African or European swallow?" Dick replied and looked at Robin #3 who nodded.

_"I saw that, Mr. Drake! You cheated! Oh well, it was just silly anyway. Dick, just give a quick intro, okay?"_ Arcanum requested.

"Uh, sure, I'm Dick Grayson. I am the first Robin I take it. I am an orphan. Both my parents died at the circus. A nice man took me in and I live there. What else?" Dick introduced himself.

"Do not ask what his favorite color is!" Robin #3 interjected.

_"Damn, you're getting to know me too well! Very good Dick, Mr. Todd, your turn." _Arcanum shrugged.

"I'm Jason Todd and I'm the second Robin. I might not be an orphan. My father was killed by Two-Face, but my mother may be alive somewhere and as soon as I return, I…" Jason began.

_"You'll go look for her, right?" _Arcanum asked, her voice strangely somber.

"Yes, I will. I was also taken in by the nice man that took Dick in." Jason finished and removed his mask.

_"You also had one of the most interesting first encounters with Batman! Tell them!" _Arcanum requested.

"I…uh…was stealing the tires off the Batmobile." Jason said sheepishly.

The others all chuckled. Arcanum smiled sadly.

Robin #3 removed his mask.

"I'm Tim Drake and I am an orphan now." Tim began and a gasp was heard from Robin #4.

"When did that happen? Oh, Tim, I'm so sorry!" Robin #4 said sympathetically and put her arms around Tim to comfort him. He went still in her embrace. Arcanum was thankful that no one could see her, because she was fighting back tears.

"Yeah, anyway, my mother was killed years ago by the Obeah Man and my father was just killed recently by Captain Boomerang. I live by myself and I became Robin because I figured out Batman's identity and helped him defeat Two-Face." Tim finished and pulled away from Robin #4. She sent him a hurt look. Robin #5's face took on a look of concern.

_"You also had a really cool moment when you saved Batman from Scarecrow which earned you the right to your new Robin costume, which I must say, sorry Dick and Jason, is SO MUCH cooler! No fish-scaled underwear and elf shoes!"_ Arcanum said adamantly, causing Dick and Jason to send glares her way and trying to hide blushes, while the other three Robins were chuckling.

Robin #4 removed her mask and Robin #5 was surprised.

'This did not happen before. Odd.' She thought to herself.

"Well, I'm next. I am the fourth Robin and my name is Stephanie Brown. My mother is still alive, but my father is dead. He died on a suicide mission for the government, but he used to be a criminal. He called himself the Cluemaster." Stephanie began.

_"He's a Riddler rip-off."_ Arcanum clarified, earning a glare from Stephanie and looks of recognition from the others.

_'He's also not dead; Stephanie, but I'll save that for next chapter.'_ Arcanum thought to herself.

"Anyway, I used to be a vigilante, as they called me, named Spoiler." Stephanie continued.

_"And remember folks, her costume was eggplant, not purple."_ Arcanum added. Tim smiled a brief moment.

"Yes, it was. Everyone used to say it was purple. It was so annoying." Stephanie complained.

_"But I like purple! My favorite anime character's hair is purple. Well, violet, but still purple."_ Arcanum reasoned.

Stephanie tried, but could not help laughing at the silliness.

"Anyway, that's not important. I started chasing after him because I thought he was cute. We dated for a while and after he retired, I became Robin." Stephanie explained, motioning to Tim.

"You mean after you took the job behind my back." Tim said angrily.

"Oh, right after you cheated on me!" Stephanie yelled back.

**_"ENOUGH!" _**Arcanum yelled so loud, it shook the whole room.

_"We shall get to that argument next chapter! This is the introductions chapter and I will not have anyone messing up the precise flow of my story!"_ Arcanum screamed angrily.

"Precise flow? You mean all the silly remarks are part of it?" Robin #5 asked.

_"Of course, and as for you, Robin #5, your introduction will be different this time."_ Arcanum began. When Robin #5 gave her an inquisitive look, she continued.

_"This chapter, you are not to remove your mask or reveal your last name under any circumstances. Give your first name and a generalized background, okay?" _

"Okay," Robin #5 shrugged before continuing.

"My name is Keelia and I was an orphan, but I am not anymore."

Everyone gave her an odd look.

"It is difficult to explain. I had one past where my father was killed defending me as a newborn baby and my mother was killed just before my friends and I made a trip through time. When we returned, both my parents were alive and I somehow had memories of a different past where I never lost them. I remember both as if they were both real. It is very strange, I know. Currently, I am a member of Young Justice 2 and I am dating one of the members." Keelia continued.

"Oh, which one?" Stephanie asked curiously.

"His name is Marcus." Keelia replied.

"The one that looks like Lobo?" Tim asked.

Keelia smiled sheepishly and nodded.

"The strange thing is right before I came here, my mother suddenly vanished. My baby brother disappeared right before my eyes and I saw my hand start fading away. It was almost as if, my brother and I faded from existence." Keelia said seriously.

_"It certainly is an important issue and one that will be explored next chapter when we take a peek into my pal, Xeria's pocket dimension, but for now, this chapter was seriously lacking silliness so it must end. Ja!"_ Arcanum waved.


	3. Deal Out the Fates

Five Robins in a Room

By Kelly M. Maraglia

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Robin_, _Young Justice_, or _DC Comics_ in any way. The only Robin I own is Keelia, who is now the fifth Robin in existence. I do not own any _Monty Python_ references; I just own all of _Flying Circus_ on tape and _Holy Grail_ on DVD. This chapter is dedicated to all of us who post on the ExtremeRobin message board. We have suffered of late, trying to stay loyal to a comic that has recently sucked.

_Chapter 3 – Deal Out the Fates_

We return once again to the little room now revealed to be Arcanum's Pocket Dimension. On our last episode, four of the five Robins in the supposed historical continuity of DC Comics revealed their secret identities to each other. This erupted into an argument between Tim and Stephanie and much confusion for Robin #5. Will these issues be resolved in this episode? What will be revealed in the other pocket dimensions? Will Dick and Jason ever overcome the trauma of having to wear the original Robin costume? Exactly how boring can working at a calendar stand be? Is it more boring than a four-hour training on substance abuse? What did those last questions have to do with this story? Will I ever stop asking questions? Narrator is beaten over the head with a stick.

Ow! Let us find out as Arcanum deals out the Fates….

"_Hi everyone, it has been a while!"_ Arcanum called out cheerfully.

"We were starting to think you would never show up again," Tim commented dryly.

"_Think or hope_?" Arcanum asked for clarification.

"No comment," Tim replied.

"_Ouch, well, let us begin episode thee, shall we_?" Arcanum prompted.

"You ask like we have a choice." Jason put in gloomily.

"_Whine, whine, bitch_ _bitch, complain, complain_." Arcanum mumbled. Then the videophone rang, a small screen appeared and on the screen was a young woman's face. Her hair was a long, violent violet color and the Robins could not distinguish the color of her eyes because she spoke with them closed.

"Hello fellow demonic creature, are your captives as interesting as mine? They certainly taste good." The face spoke in a melodious, amused tone.

The Robins blanched.

"Are you planning on eating us, Miss Arcanum?" Dick asked, fear apparent in his voice.

"I think that qualifies as a 'better not ask' question." Keelia retorted, sarcasm and a fear intertwining in her tone.

"_Oh no, Xeria and I are both demons of some sort. Therefore, we can feed off negative emotions. I choose not to, but I cannot say the same for her, you know_?' Arcanum clarified and the Robins sighed.

"So who is captive in her dimension, anyone we know?" Stephanie asked out of curiosity.

"_Actually, yes, Xeria, how about we let our captives see each other_?" Arcanum replied simply.

"That might ruin the secrets, ne?" Xeria cautioned and opened one eye to reveal an amazing amethyst color.

"_Just think of the drama though_!" Arcanum raved.

"True, alright," Xeria smiled ad stepped away from the video phone. The screen expanded to the length of an entire wall. The five Robins gathered in front and mixed emotions of shock, wonder, and happiness washed over them.

Within Xeria's Pocket Dimension, there was a small variety of people. Batman stared rarely dumbfounded at the five incarnations of his brightly colored decoy. Nightwing looked shocked as he stared at himself as a young boy. Red Hood, minus the hood, but still masked and recently revealed to be Jason Todd stared at his younger self with a mixture of sadness, anger and guilt. Marcus Lobo was there as well and he was the first to speak.

"Where the frag have you been, Darlin'? Do you know how fraggin' worried I was!" He bellowed, banging on the screen.

Keelia could not help herself; she smiled, walked up to the screen and covered Marcus' hand with her own.

"I'm sorry I worried you Marcus. If you only knew how happy I am to see you." She whispered to him in a quiet tone. His face softened.

"I'm just glad you're safe Darlin'. I came in the house only to see you fadin' away. Next thing I know, the scenery around me starts changing to all fraggin' weird and I black out and wake up stuck in this fraggin' room with this fraggin' nutcase!" Marcus explained referring to Xeria who simply smiled with her eyes closed.

"The scenery changed?" Keelia questioned.

"_It would seem that something changed to alter the future which would explain why you and your brother faded away and the scenery changed_." Arcanum reasoned.

"Then why didn't I go with it?" Marcus asked.

"I was able to bring you here because your spirit was determined not to change with the scenery, probably because of your strong connection to her." Xeria explained, referring to Keelia.

"Anyhow, I would like to introduce the other captives of my room." Xeria continued.

"_Who else do you have in there_?" Arcanum questioned.

"Well, here's one I'm going to send you because the costume fits." Xeria began.

A young girl with short orange hair, wearing the original Robin costume fell into the room of Robins.

"_Oh, I forgot Carrie. She was from an awesome side story, but she does not count toward continuity, so I am not going to keep her here_." Arcanum explained to the confused Robins, before kicking Carrie off the island.

"Technically, your fifth Robin over there doesn't exist either." Xeria pointed out.

"_She is cool, so she stays_." Arcanum simply shrugged.

"Uh, thank you Arcanum." Keelia said uneasily.

"_Welcome, so who else is in there_?" Arcanum asked again.

"I have the Tormented One." Xeria said in a low, mysterious tone. Both her eyes opened and an evil smirk graced her face.

"_You are torturing some? Cool, who_?" Arcanum asked excitedly.

Xeria gestured to an older woman, strapped to the ceiling with duck tape. She had numerous cuts on her body.

"That's Dr. Thompkins!" Dick exclaimed.

"Let her go, you monster!" Jason yelled. Xeria's eyes darkened and power exploded all around her in her rage.

"It's MAZOKU, not monster! Damn Central Park Media! I'm a MAZOKU!" Xeria screamed, frightening the inhabitants of both dimensions. Then she paused, took a deep breath and calmed down.

"Besides, I won't let her go. I'm going to let her slowly bleed to death when I have easy access to a healer. That's what doctors do, isn't it Leslie?" Xeria said cruelly and laughed.

"No, please just kill me." Leslie coughed and begged.

"From what I've heard you did Leslie, your fate is divine justice." Red Hood added coldly.

"You really became twisted, Jason! It's not our right to decide that!" Nightwing yelled at his successor. Red Hood just shrugged.

"I agree with the nutcase and the so-called twisted one. The story is that this doctor fragged a teenage girl by purposely not treating her wounds." Marcus put his two cents in. Xeria then stole the two pennies.

"Hey, give those back, you fraggin' nut!" Marcus yelled and began chasing Xeria around the room.

"No, the more appropriate fate is for her to face justice…" Batman began.

"…And get out a month later for good behavior." Red Hood put in earning a glare from Batman.

"Now I'm going to introduce my crazed, justice-loving Aunt Amelia." Xeria announced as Amelia Wil Tesla Saillune appeared in Xeria's Dimension.

"You call yourself a healer and yet you take a life, heaven may forgive you, but Amelia will not!" The "justice freak" began her usual justice speech, much to Xeria's chagrin, and pointed directly at Leslie.

"**You suck at life!**"

There was a pause as what Amelia actually said suck in and then mostly everyone collapsed, laughing hysterically.

"Thanks Auntie, I need that." Xeria said pretending to wipe a tear away from he eye.

"It was the only justifiable thing to say!" Amelia said and left.

"_Actually, Xeria, I have a more appropriate punishment for our Miss Not-so-worthy doctor_." Arcanum said in a truly sinister tone.

"Oh, is it the comfy chair?" Xeria asked.

"_No_," Arcanum replied.

"The soft cushions?" Xeria tried again.

Neither noticed that those who understood the references slapped their hands to their foreheads.

"_Nope, you shall see_." Arcanum answered and suddenly Leslie disappeared and reappeared in an entirely different dimension, which both dimensions watched through a different video screen.

"Welcome to Kelly's Inferno where those who receive the 'sucking at life sentence' come!" Kelly, who looked a lot like Arcanum, only human, announced.

The inhabitants of Kelly's Inferno included such nefarious creatures as the Joker, bad English voice actors, Black Mask, Frieza, Yuuna, Meyrin, annoying baseball teams and others that suck at life.

"No not here, don't leave me here!" Leslie begged.

"Arcanum, I commend you for the purity of your evil." Xeria added with a smirk.

"_Thanks Xeria, no, you belong there now Leslie_." Arcanum pronounced.

"Oh f a duck, I suck!" Leslie cried.

There was pause then mostly everyone laughed.

"I didn't see that one coming." Xeria commented.

"_Neither did I_," Arcanum said in addition.

"I did, that is what everyone says when they come here. Don't worry about her, Saint Phoenix usually takes care of them after a while." Kelly shrugged.

"Cool, bye now!" Xeria said and she and Arcanum waved.

"Bye," Kelly saluted and videophone for the Inferno shut off and disappeared.

"Weren't you supposed to deal out the fates this episode?" Xeria asked Arcanum.

"_Oh yeah, oops, well, there is always next year_." Arcanum chuckled nervously.

"What are you, a Red Sox fan?" Xeria cracked.

"_Well, yeah, anyhow this episode was not nearly as silly_." Arcanum assessed.

"It was demonically silly." Xeria reasoned.

"_Actually, it was just demonic. Goodbye for now, Xeria_!" Arcanum debated back.

Xeria waved and the other pocket dimension disappeared, much to the Robins' dismay.

"_Do_ _not fret; you shall see them again, after I deal out the fates_!" Arcanum announced.

"Weren't you supposed to do that this episode?" Stephanie asked.

"_Uh…it is a two-part episode_." Arcanum declared suddenly.

"The episode is practically over and you declare it a two-part episode?" Tim asked, flabbergasted

"_Yes, just picture 'to be continued' popping up on the screen_." Arcanum answered.

"Why?" Dick asked.

"_Because_," Arcanum answered.

"I'm going to regret this, but because why?" Jason asked in annoyance.

"_Because it is the silly thing to do of course_!" Arcanum answered.

There was a pause and then everyone collapsed while Arcanum simply laughed.

COMING SOON: Deal out the Fates part II

Or

Chapter 4

**Extra Notes: **Shout-outs to my friend Tim and my coworker Jamie for their quotes I stole. Uh…not stole, consider them tributes! hee hee

Quick note: I do not usually refer to Robin as Batman's brightly colored decoy, but this story is silly after all.

In addition, I mentioned anime references to _Slayers, DBZ, Saint and Gundam Seed Destiny_. I don't own these Animes. If I owned _Slayers_, there would be a fourth season. If I owned _DBZ_, we would all worship Vegeta. If I owned _Gundam Seed Destiny_, then the two characters that split up at the end of the series would have stayed together. If I owned _Saint Seiya_, then volume thirteen would be released.

As far as the reference to Kelly's Inferno, I need to put it on because it is good. When I do, please read it.

Yes, there is a Red Sox reference, but sue me. I am in withdrawal until April. I do not own them.


	4. Deal Out the Fates part II

Five Robins in a Room

By Kelly M. Maraglia

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Robin_, _Young Justice_, or _DC Comics_ in any way. The only Robin I own is Keelia, who is now the fifth Robin in existence. I do not own any _Monty Python_ or anime references. I do not own _Jeopardy_ either. I cannot guarantee the amount of silliness in this chapter. It may be quite serious.

We return to Arcanum's Pocket Dimension where the atmosphere is intense. The five Robins sat in their respective, numbered comfy chairs and awaited the return of Arcanum.

"I wonder when she'll come back." Dick commented.

"Hopefully never," Jason murmured.

"I hate to say it, but I agree with Jason. I bear no hatred toward Arcanum, but she has no right to trap us here and 'deal out our fates' as she puts it." Tim agreed, just as annoyed.

"I'm scared," Stephanie said quietly.

Everyone looked at her in shock.

"What that look for? I'm not ashamed to admit it just because you all are! I'm scared to know my fate because I just have a really bad feeling!" Stephanie screamed, tears escaping from her eyes.

Tim turned away from her. He wanted to hold her, to comfort her, but he couldn't if he wanted to hold it together himself. Then he felt a nudge from Jason. Dick nodded at Tim and Keelia smiled at him.

Tim took a deep breath and slowly put his arm around Stephanie. She immediately collapsed onto his chest in sobs. Tim closed his eyes in an effort to fight back his own tears. He put both arms around Stephanie and found himself pulling her tighter. That is when he realized that this might be his last chance to hold her. That brought his tears out and he remembered that he had not shed one tear for her yet. The tears that had built up considerably all came out. Dick, Jason and Keelia all stayed quiet. It seemed to Tim and Stephanie that they were the only ones in the room … until their separate comfy chairs were magically transformed into one comfy love seat. They immediately released their hold on each other.

"_Aw, I was trying to make you two more comfortable." _Arcanum whined.

"You ruined the mood." Keelia said, shaking her head.

"_Darn, well my friends, our time together is nearly at an end. _" Arcanum complained.

The five Robins cheered loudly.

"_Hey, I make the jokes here! Anyhow, it is time for me to deal out your fates." _With Arcanum's pronouncement, _Jeopardy_ machines appeared in front of each Robin.

"_The category is 'My Fate.' You have thirty seconds. Good luck."_ Arcanum spoke in true Alex Trebec fashion and then the _Jeopardy_ music began. Thirty seconds later, it ended and the Robins had finished typing their answers.

_"Okay Dick, we shall begin with you. You chose, 'What is become Batman?' You are correct." _Arcanum announced as the portal to Xeria's Pocket Dimension opens.

"_I am under the assumption that they cannot see or hear us right now; therefore I can point out certain important people. Richard Grayson, you survive your time as Robin, one of the few that do." _Arcanum began.

The others gulped.

"_After a while, you decide you are sick of being in Batman's shadow and you want to become your own man. You become Nightwing. That is you." _Arcanum pointed out Nightwing.

"That's me? I look cool!" Dick exclaimed excitedly.

"_Indeed, you do become Batman for a short time and Tim was the Robin at your side."_ Arcanum continued.

Tim nodded at Dick.

"_Assist me further, will you Keelia?" _Arcanum requested.

"In my time, you are Batman again, Uncle Dick." Keelia supplied.

"Holy revelations Batman!" Dick said excitedly.

Unbeknownst to the Robins and Arcanum, the inhabitants of Xeria's Dimension could see them and hear every word. If the Robins had been paying attention, they would have seen Nightwing slap his forehead in embarrassment and Red Hood pointing and laughing at him.

"_Ugh, you are the King of Cheddar, Dick. Shall we move on, Jason? You wrote, 'What is surpassing Batman?' Interesting answer, not yet, but still possible_." Arcanum replied and suddenly appeared in the room.

This surprised the Robins because to them, Arcanum had been a bodiless voice. Most had found her annoying, but now they could see an ethereal beauty. Arcanum was dressed in a long black evening-style gown made of velvet and the finest silk. The dress neck was cut low so that her inhumanly pale skin was quite visible. A dark cloak was thrown back over her shoulders so that the dress may be seen. Her hair was long and straight. It was the color of sweet chestnuts that one may roast on an open fire. Her eyes were a deep shade of hazel, almost hypnotic to look into, but the wisdom in those eyes was unmistakable. Arcanum smiled gently and the Robins could see tiny fangs in her mouth.

"I thought you said you were a demon, not a vampire!" Jason shouted the thought that all five had.

"Well, technically I am a vampire, but I still have the powers of a demon and can summon the spells of a witch. It is in my blood." Arcanum explained.

"Hey, your dialogue isn't italicized anymore." Keelia pointed out.

"I am here with you now so it need not be." Arcanum replied, before stepping toward Jason and continuing.

"I felt it was only right for me to deal this fate in person. In addition, it is important to note that the Robin of current timeline is Tim and that puts three of you in the past and one in the future. Jason Todd, you are the first Robin to die."

Jason's eyes widened and he started shaking. Dick looks at him sympathetically and the other three turn their heads. Arcanum pulled Jason into her embrace and rocked him.

"I am truly sorry, Jason." She said sincerely as a tear fell from her eye.

"But wait, you said he has a chance to surpass Batman! How can he if he's …" Dick started but broke off.

"Dead, go ahead and say it! I die and you, Mr. Golden Child go on to become Batman! Do you know how hard it is trying to fill your shoes! Do you know how **sick** I am of being compared to you!" Jason yelled angrily and Dick looked away.

"You're being unfair Jason. It isn't easy following you either! Batman wasn't even going to give me a shot because he still blames himself for your death!" Tim yelled at Jason.

"Well, it sure sucks following you, Tim! There wasn't one HOUR that went by that Batman didn't say something like, 'well, Tim learned it in this much time.'" Stephanie added.

"Well, then I guess Keelia has it the worst, huh?" Tim suggested. Keelia smiled and nodded.

"However, Jason may still be able to surpass Batman." Arcanum put in.

"How?" Jason asked the question on most of their minds.

Arcanum pointed out elder Jason.

"You have been revived from death." She stated simply.

"Oh that's right. Nightwing called him Jason before." Stephanie added.

"How was I revived from death?" Jason asked.

"An **extremely** good question, Mr. Todd, but it beats the hell out of me. All I know is that you the coolest villain in Batman history right now. Not only that, but you are against the two villains that qualify as the worst in Batman's Gallery – Joker and Black Mask." Arcanum explained.

"Black Mask, that pathetic loser, he's B-rate." Keelia added in disgust.

"Keelia, you who have a history of despising the Joker above all, may come to hate Black Mask even more. Now shall we move on? Tim, you wrote, 'What is I don't care as long as I don't become Batman?' Odd answer, but you are correct, at least for now. Keelia?" Arcanum motioned to the fifth Robin as she pondered Tim's response.

"You are actually Nightwing in my time." She supplied.

"That's fine as long as I'm never Batman!" Tim said angrily.

"Despite what you say, you have the attitude down." Arcanum said seriously.

"I'm not like him!" Tim screamed.

"But you are well on your way! You shut yourself off from people! You do not have to fake the dark attitude anymore; it is a part of you! You do not even allow yourself the proper time to heal from all the deaths around you!" Arcanum screamed back at him. The room shook with her power. She calmed herself down and continued.

"Tim, the ones that really know you do not want you to become Batman either. Please, let it go." Arcanum pleaded with Tim who started shaking with repressed emotions. Arcanum hugged him to her as she had done with Jason, but quickly passed him to Stephanie to comfort him. Tim put one arm around her shoulders and held her hand with the other one. He fought back his tears because he knew what was to come next. His eyes pleaded with Arcanum to stop, but her eyes were firm.

"Shall we move forward then? Stephanie you chose, 'What is death?' This may surprise Keelia, but Stephanie you are …." Arcanum closed her eyes before continuing.

"Correct," She finished as Stephanie collapsed into Tim's embrace, sobbing.

"So that's what happened then." Keelia commented softly, falling back into her chair.

"Before we move on to our last contestant, I want to clear up the misunderstanding between Tim and Stephanie that took place in episode two." Arcanum brought up.

"It doesn't matter anymore. Tim, I forgive you for cheating on me. I'm sorry I became Robin behind your back." Stephanie choked out. Tim looked confused.

"What girl?"

"Darla Dimwit." Arcanum supplied.

"Darla, but I didn't…" Tim began and then a light bulb appeared above his head and turned on. Then it ceased to float in midair and bopped Tim off the head.

"Ouch, Steph, you saw her kiss me in front of the school, didn't you? And that's why you weren't talking to me before you became Robin?" Tim deduced. Stephanie nodded.

"See folks, he is a detective genius." Arcanum cracked and the others chuckled.

Tim shot her a mild glare.

"Steph, she kissed me despite that I told her that I had a girlfriend." Tim explained.

"So all this is my fault then?" Stephanie said guiltily.

"Nonsense, it is simply a matter of crappy communication in your relationship." Arcanum said cheerfully and received matching mild glares from both Tim and Stephanie.

"In addition, I call Darla a dimwit because she assumed Tim was making his girlfriend up because no one at their school had ever seen you." Arcanum explained.

"That's stupid." Jason assessed.

"Very stupid," Dick agreed.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! What if I lived in a different state? Hasn't she ever heard of long-distance relationships?" Stephanie exploded in anger.

"Stephanie, there is a reason I call her 'dimwit.'" Arcanum added.

"I'm sorry, Tim." Stephanie said quietly.

"I'm sorry, too Stephanie." Tim replied. Then they shared a quick kiss.

"Aw!" Everyone else put in.

Tim and Stephanie blushed.

"Shall we conclude the fates then?" Arcanum began. At everyone's nod, she continued.

"Keelia you wrote, 'I will never exist.' Well, it is not in the form of a question, but as of right now, you are correct. You may now remove your mask and reveal your identity." Arcanum announced.

All the Robins gathered and the members of Xeria's Dimension as well. All were anxious to see who the future Robin would never be.

Keelia removed her mask and looked right at Tim and Stephanie.

"I am Keelia Robin Drake and I was … your daughter." She said in a sad and defeated tone.

Tim and Stephanie gasped, dramatic music played and lightning struck.

**Is Keelia really doomed to non-existence?**

**Will Jason and Stephanie go back to pushing up daisies?**

**Will Dick change his Robin costume the moment he gets home?**

**Will Tim refuse to ever watch Monty Python again?**

**Find out next in the epilogue:**

**Same BIRD-Time Same BIRD-Website**


	5. Epilogue

Five Robins in a Room

By Kelly M. Maraglia

Epilogue

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any moose or any _DC Comics_ elements. I do own Keelia, but not the Killer Rabbit.

THE AUTHOR WOULD LIKE TO NOTE THAT THOSE HIRED TO WRITE THE DISCLAIMER HAVE BEEN SACKED.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any _Monty Python_ or the lovely lakes. Nor any anime references or references to anything else like the Spanish Inquisition.

THE AUTHOR WOULD LIKE TO NOTE THAT THOSE IN CHARGE OF SACKING THOSE WHO WERE SACKED HAVE JUST BEEN SACKED.

**Disclaimer:** I cannot guarantee the amount of silliness in this chapter because a moose once bit my sister.

THE AUTHOR WOULD LIKE TO NOTE THAT EVERYONE WORKING ON THE DISCLAIMER HAS BEEN SACKED AND IT HAS BEEN FINISHED AT THE LAST MINUTE AND AT GREAT EXPENSE.

**Disclaimer: Story by Llama L. Llama**

**Starring Five Christmas-colored Llamas**

**Co-starring Psychedelic & Psychotic Llamas**

**Hosted by Sadomasochistic Llamas:**

**Arcanum Llama mhgf cdgj vbmfdgbj Llama**

**Xeria Llama hg jcfgvj hgdrghdkfhrgk Llama **

"I am Keelia Robin Drake and I was … your daughter." She said in a sad and defeated tone.

Tim and Stephanie gasped.

"No way!" Dick and Jason yelled simultaneously.

The members of Xeria's Pocket Dimension, except Marcus, were all shocked.

"Tim she has your eyes!" Stephanie exclaimed.

"She looks like a female version of him!" Jason shouted.

"No wonder Miss Arcanum told her not to remove her mask until now." Dick reasoned.

"Keelia, your fate is non-existence because your mother died before she could give birth to you. She was given wounds by Black Mask that eventually killed her. However, much of the blame can be placed on Leslie as well." Arcanum announced with her voice as sad as they had heard it.

"I was the one Leslie let die?" Stephanie asked in shock.

"Yes. These fates await you when you leave here. Xeria has freed her hostages by now…" Arcanum began.

"I'm trying to, but this one won't leave!" Xeria yelled through the videophone.

"I'm not fraggin' leavin' without my woman!" Marcus yelled through the videophone. Tears began to fall from Keelia's face and she started to run to the wall where the videophone was. Marcus ripped though the dimensions and made his way to her. He enveloped her in his arms. She cried onto his chest and held onto him very tightly.

"I'm not leaving you behind, I swear it!" Marcus spoke firmly, but there was a crack in his voice.

The others stayed quiet and watched this romantic and depressing scene unfold.

"Marcus, you have a life back there." Keelia said between sobs.

"It wouldn't be a life worth livin' without you, Darlin'!" Marcus stated sincerely and held her tighter. Keelia cried harder and tried to hold Marcus with all her strength, but he slowly faded from her arms. She collapsed to the floor on her knees.

"He has returned to his world and time. Now it is time for all of you to return as well." Xeria said, joining them in the original room.

Arcanum turned away for a moment, wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Forgive me, for not being able to save you all. I can only hope that my small intervention may help a bit. Farewell, my friends, farewell." Arcanum spoke so softly that they had to strain their ears to hear her.

One by one, the Robins began to fade.

Dick closed his eyes and faded peacefully.

Jason smiled at Arcanum, mouthed 'thank you' and faded.

Tim and Stephanie held each other as tightly as possible and then reached out to Keelia. Keelia reached for them. She stretched her fingers as far as they could go until…

…she was able to grasp her brother, Jason's hand.

"Keely, what does this box sound like?" He asked ever so innocently.

"It sounds like a detective kit, Jason." Keelia smiled and laughed lightly.

"Cool!" Jason said excitedly.

Keelia made her way to the kitchen and leaned against the doorframe smiling at what she saw. Her parents were both there, just simply holding each other. They looked up at her and smiled and she joined them for a brief family hug.

The doorbell signaled the arrival of their guests. Marcus was behind the door when Keelia opened it. He immediately picked her up and swung her around. She smiled and tears brimmed at her eyes.

"Merry Christmas Darlin'! Don't you ever leave me again!" He said and kissed her under the mistletoe.

"Ew," came the response from Lil' Jason.

"I don't plan on it." Keelia replied and kissed Marcus again.

"Ew," came the response from Lil' Jason.

"Ew, huh, come 'ere brat!" Marcus says jokingly and chases Lil' Jason around the house, while the youngest Drake just laughed.

After mostly everyone had arrived, the doorbell rang again. It was Dick and he had brought someone else with him.

"Look who I dug up everyone!" Dick said jokingly.

"That is a REALLY bad pun!" Elder Jason said in mock annoyance.

Keelia looked at her family, the love of her life and all her friends and smiled. She looked out the window at the stars as the snow started to fall.

"Thank you."

**The End … and there was much rejoicing**

Yay

Author's Story End Note: I know this story is no longer possible with the way things are going in Batman & Robin comics these days, but this is my response to the recent storylines. Please look forward to my next projects: "ACHM 35" & "A Czarnian in Retail."


End file.
